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I think I’ve finally found it. The sweet spot. Not as Wikipedia defines it (so I suppose that link is useless), but as Courtney’s Unabridged Useless Dictionary defines it (to borrow a term from my big brother Bryan). I have found what I was created for. Or, at least, one of the things.
I’m officially a singer-songwriter. I sing, and I write songs. And then I sing the songs I write (full circle!). And when I do it, I feel…perfect. Not as though I am blameless, by any means, but I feel whole and complete in my own skin, as if I am doing exactly what God designed me to do.
It’s incredible, because my whole life I’ve dreamed of doing this, and never in a million years thought it’d ever happen. I made 8 song videos tonight. Well really it was 7, because one I didn’t know the camera was rolling and just said, “Is it going? *picks up camera* Oh my gosh!” So I made 7 song videos, one of which was a cover I cut short because it was my first time playing it through and it sucked, the rest of which were my five original songs, three of which are as yet unfinished. It was so much fun!!! I’m dying to write more songs now! I think I’ll write one tomorrow. Or maybe finish one of the unfinished ones.
Anywho, just thought I’d share my joy with y’all. I’m so pumped up for this EP it’s not even funny. I might call it “Paradox of Dreams.” So far that’s the best title I’ve got. But we’ll see. There’s plenty of time.
Makin' the vids in da kitchen :)
It never ceases to amaze me that God wants to involve us in His plan to win hearts and bring His kingdom here. He definitely doesn’t need us, but He chooses to work in and through us to reach a hurting world with the best news ever. It’s completely illogical; but of course, He is not a “logical” God. Grace isn’t logical, and neither is mercy. Joy in suffering isn’t logical. Generosity and even love itself aren’t logical.
I absolutely love that we serve such a baffling God.
Switchfoot’s song “Awakening” is one of my life songs. It perfectly describes my reaction to God’s invitation. I began my day by listening to it, and by the end of my day it took on an even more significant meaning. I pray that you would find yourself awakening because of God’s call on your life.
These dreams started singing to me out of nowhere
And in all my life I don’t know that I ever felt so alive,
Alive
Now that I have seen, I am responsible. Faith without deeds is dead.
I can’t listen to that song without getting chills. Yesterday morning I went to the church I attended from 7th through 11th grades, a church whose service I haven’t gone to since the summer of 2007. When the message began, I suddenly was struck with a quick stream of thoughts on church and the Christian life that I was sure were God speaking to me. I immediately seized pen and paper and wrote the following. My audience is specifically the Seven24 community, but I believe this applies to anyone who calls him or herself a Christian and is not a pastor.
~*~
What if a lack of ‘fabulous teaching’ is actually a good thing? What if we should only be fed like that every so often instead of every week? What if that means that we need to read our Bibles ourselves and ask God to speak to us straight from His word? Maybe Brian Kiley leaving us and taking his awesome messages with him is a good thing. Maybe God wants to stretch & mature us. Maybe He’s calling us to search the Scrpitures together and challenge each other instead of waiting for a pastor to do it all for us. Maybe He’s calling us to stop relying on everyone else to feed us, to step up and take responsibility for our growth. That’s what we’re trying to get our high schoolers to do, but are our college students doing it?
Also, are we getting spiritually fat? Are we putting feet to our faith? Faith without deeds is dead, the Bible says (James 2:14-26). Maybe as BK is leaving, it is time for us to do something different.
Here’s my proposition. Let’s stop placing all the importance on what the speaker says on Sunday nights. Church is what happens Monday through Saturday, outside the four walls of the Venue room. Let’s commit to small groups for real, and let’s actually study the Bible as if we had no Sunday night message. If we seek God, we will find Him, so let’s seek Him ourselves. And let’s not stop there. Let’s commit to loving people, not just in words or with warm & fuzzy feelings, but with actions. Let’s not just do it a few times a week when we volunteer, but let’s figure out what love looks like as a lifestyle.
God is poking at my heart, telling me there’s something missing, something more He has for us if only we’ll reach for it. We’re not totally getting it. If we commit to changing things, I guarantee you not everyone will follow. Some will disagree. Some will be “too busy” to commit. Some will not “feel called.” Some will say we’re being too harsh. But how can we call ourselves Christians, aka “little Christs” if our lives look nothing like His? No, I’m not saying we need to sell everything and wander the streets preaching. I’m saying our lives should look radically different from those of the world. Our lives should look like adequate responses to the incredible cross, and I think that looks pretty different from the way we live now.
I think it’s time to stop waiting for some sort of revival and looking forward to the next butt-kicking message. It’s time to get off our butts and become the revival.
What Seven24 needs, I think, is not another great speaker. What we need is a leader who believes in changing things, in taking us back to the way Jesus showed us how to live. We need to band together and commit to becoming ordinary radicals, responding in the only logical way to God’s crazy love.
